Moving in with your partner is a big step in any relationship, and merging your styles and deciding how to decorate isn’t always top of mind—until you’re surrounded by moving boxes in your new living room wondering, “Now what?” My partner and I recently moved into our rental house in Bellingham, WA, and it was definitely a learning experience in working together to make it a home. I had just moved back to the country after living abroad, and he had lived with roommates or in temporary accommodation for years. We were basically starting from scratch. After some bumps and scrapes, we’ve finally managed to make a space that feels homey and uniquely ours—but we both admit we could have done things a bit better!
Having experienced the challenges and joys of moving in with a partner firsthand, I turned to interior designers, lifestyle coaches, and other experts to gather their top tips for navigating this life change. Whether you and your partner are moving in together because of the cost of apartments in New York City, or you’re considering a house for sale in York, PA, we hope these tips will help you and your significant other create a space that feels like home for the both of you.
Start with taking inventory before you move
Before you even start thinking of decorating, it’s important to take stock of what you both already own before you move. Manhattan, NY-based Ashley Billone from the lifestyle and travel blog Hello Weekend & Co. recommends making a detailed list of everything you’re bringing into the shared space.
“Moving in with a partner after having lived either alone or with another roommate can feel overwhelming,” Billone confesses. “You most likely have different decorating styles and you’re meshing a variety of furniture and decor pieces. Ahead of the big move-in day, it’s important to take inventory of what you both have. Depending on the size of your new place together, you may not need two beds, two couches, etc. Once you write everything out of what you both have, it makes things a lot easier because you have everything written down in one place. From there, you can decide what pieces you’ll take and what ones you’ll either store away, donate or sell.”
HGTV-featured interior designer Connie Hammond adds that it’s important to make sure everything you’re bringing will fit comfortably into your new space. “Pick the best size and shape of furniture that works in your rooms,” she says, “The focus should be the pieces that fit your new home best, blending both of your needs and desires together.” Having this clarity ahead of time will make moving day smoother and allow you to focus on creating a cohesive space.
When it comes to blending styles, compromise is key
“Compromise is essential for building a space that reflects both partners’ needs and desires,” emphasizes Suma Karandikar, co-founder of the midwest-based clinic Thrive With Therapy. “Identify your core, non-negotiable needs, such as natural light, functional furniture, or a calming color palette,” Karandikar suggests. “From there, be open to collaborating on the decorative details.”
Janice Pollard, representing short-term rental marketing and design agency Marshmallow Hill, follows up this idea with a simple yet effective exercise: “Each partner should write down their ‘must-haves,’ ‘nice-to-haves,’ and, of course, ‘hard passes.’ Then, compare notes.” By understanding what matters most to each of you, you’ll find common ground and avoid unnecessary conflicts.
Moving in with your partner will have its ups and downs as you adjust to the experience of living together. Disagreements over design choices, chores, or what time to eat dinner are bound to happen. Mila and Jeremy Smith who run Single to Couple Relationship Coaching assure us that this is perfectly normal. “No one can agree on everything all the time,” the Smiths reiterate. “On the other hand, regularly suppressing your thoughts and feelings is not healthy for you or the relationship. Most couples will do their best to make joint decisions; however, when it’s not possible, compromise by letting both of you have a say in your new routine or how you contribute (for example, an element of design or your own space). It’s better to have an eclectic home reflecting your personalities than living in an unhappy place looking as though it’s come off a page of a furniture catalogue.” If differences do arise, remember to communicate in a friendly and respectful manner with your partner—after all, you’re on the same team.
Use separate spaces to reflect your individual tastes
If blending everything feels overwhelming, consider carving out designated spaces for each person to add their personal touch. Samantha Flores, motherhood blogger at Her Journal shares, “If your styles are very different, compromise by decorating separate rooms. Maybe your partner gets the spare bedroom, and you get the office.” Creating “zones” allows for individual expression while keeping the shared spaces cohesive.
For neurodiverse couples, Natalie Roberts, a neurodiverse relationship coach, emphasizes the importance of personal space and alone time. “Prioritize individual areas to support sensory needs and avoid preference abandonment—giving up what’s important to you—or preference projection, which is persuading others on what’s important to you.” Whether it’s a reading nook or a workspace, having a retreat of your own can make all the difference in creating a harmonious living space with your partner.
Begin with the basics and let your space evolve together
When you’re moving in with your partner, there’s no need to rush to fill every corner of your home. Fatma Saydem, the owner of interior design firm FS Interiors advises, “Take your time decorating; start with the basics and let the space evolve naturally as you live in it.” Focus on foundational pieces like a sofa, a dining table, and a comfortable bed, and slowly layer in decor that reflects your journey together.
Soni Mehra, founder of South-Asian inspired home decor brand Marble Lotus, adds a reminder to focus on flexibility. “Creating a home together as a couple is all about blending individual styles while creating a cohesive and comforting space,” Mehra says. “Start by each choosing one or two personal items that carry special meaning and that reflect each person’s unique aesthetic. Find creative ways to incorporate them into your shared areas—this can add warmth and authenticity to the design.”
A thoughtful approach to blending styles can help create a space that feels truly unique. High end interior designers Savvy Design & Co reveal their secrets. “Design isn’t about following trends—it’s about curating items that make you feel alive in your own space. Start by identifying each person’s must-haves, like a favorite chair or piece of art, and use these as the foundation for a unique, shared home. Build around these essentials, focusing on pieces you both love, and keep the design flexible with neutral foundations. A personalized, well-loved space will feel more like ‘yours’ than any trend ever could.”
Seb Cowie, a father of five and author of Dad Blog shares his personal experience from when he began living with his partner: ”When my girlfriend moved in, my house was a minimalist nightmare—just budget basics and practicality, with zero style or personality. But as we started decorating together, I realised the magic in her touch; she added warmth, style, and a sense of connection I hadn’t even thought about before. Slowly, it became our home.”
Personalize your new space with art, photos, and keepsakes
One of the best ways to create a home that feels uniquely yours when moving in with your partner is by adding personal touches. Kaylee Johnson, the wedding photographer behind LaShay and Light Photography suggests displaying high-quality photos of you and your partner. “As a wedding and couples photographer, I’ve personally seen how displaying high quality photos can bring life into a room,” she shares. “Photos are also incredibly customizable: from your choice of outfits and photographer to the frame and finish, photos can help establish your desired aesthetic with a personal touch.” Whether it’s wedding photos, travel snapshots, or candid moments, photos of the two of you can bring warmth and personality to your shared space.
Shay Yellin, editor-in-chief at Bespoke Bride encourages couples to embrace DIY projects. “A handmade photo wall or custom coffee table can add warmth and character,” she suggests. You can also add a “wildcard” piece that reflects each person’s personality, even if it doesn’t perfectly align with the other’s style. Yellin reveals, “When my partner insisted on keeping his guitar collection in our minimalist living room, it seemed like a clash at first, but now I love the charm it adds. Decorating together is a gentle reminder that blending lives is about the quirks and compromises that make your space feel real.”
Don’t forget to incorporate functionality and comfort
While decorating is an important part of moving in with your partner, above all your home should feel comfortable and functional. Meredith O’Donnell, fine furniture expert, reminds couples not to skimp on good upholstery and seating to make each room a comfortable space to be. To help create a welcoming space, allow contrast in your home: “We like the word ‘eclectic’, combining new pieces with older, sentimental items you each want to keep,” O’Donnell says. Manish Bhati from Ace Craftique suggests balancing aesthetics. “A blend of clean lines and graceful curves balances simplicity with charm, creating a unique, welcoming space,” Bhati explains. “For instance if one person enjoys the simplicity of oak furniture while the other appreciates the elegance of French inspired decor, try pairing a simple oak table with a French-style armchair in modern fabric.” Whether you favor modern minimalism or cozy charm, striking a balance will help both partners feel heard.
Maintaining connection when moving in with your partner is also essential, and the way your home is set up can either aid or detract from special moments together. Intimacy and relationship coach Julie Tenner says to remember that home is more than just a good-looking room. “Create spaces that invite you to linger,” Tenner shares, “cozy nooks for coffee together, a dining area that sparks conversation, inviting spots for laughter with friends. Design your home to amplify the moments that bring you closer to each other and those you cherish.”
Finally, don’t forget about space saving storage solutions to maximize your space and free your mind from clutter. When you move in with your partner, you don’t just merge lives, you merge things as well. “Prioritize practical, beautiful storage to keep clutter at bay and create a calm, welcoming space that nurtures both of you,” Tenner recommends. “When everything has a home, it reduces overwhelm, supports well-being, and gives each of you room to breathe and thrive in your shared space.”
Try letting one person take the lead when you move in with a partner
When you and your partner move in together, one of you might be more inspired by a certain room in the house, or have particular items they can’t bear to part with. Interior designer Sarah Reed at Portland,OR-based Arbor & Co recently moved in with her partner after they both left previous marriages, leaving many items for the two of them to collaborate on in their new home. Reed shares, “I removed a few of my old pieces of furniture that I wasn’t attached to and she brought in the important pieces she loved and was attached to. We chose a new sofa together, and she was able to choose whatever items she wanted to replace as far as linens, kitchen accessories and bathroom accessories. We decided what each person was in charge of in the home, based on what we felt our specialties were in and what we cared more about. Luckily, we have the same style so it wasn’t hard!”
While divvying up decision-making might work for some, for other couples it’s best if one person takes the lead on styling the home. “Personally, I usually let my wife take the lead on decorating,” admits Taylor J Kovar, one half of finance blog The Money Couple. “She has a special touch that really brings our spaces to life, and I trust her instincts completely. She loves the process, and I love seeing the joy it brings her. While she decorates our homes and office spaces, she always asks for my opinion, too, which makes it a true partnership.”
If one partner is stepping in with decorating, Kovar suggests deciding on a central theme or color palette together as a couple to help guide the decor and to create a cohesive look throughout the home. “Embracing each other’s strengths and sharing ideas can really help you create a home that feels uniquely yours,” he concludes.
Communicate openly and respect each other’s boundaries
When you’re moving in with your partner, clear and respectful communication is essential throughout the process. Samantha Johnson from SJ Design + Build believes having honest discussions around expectations can make or break your experience of moving in together. “Combining one’s lives together can be complex, and both partners deserve to be heard,” Johnson expands. “When it comes to decorating, discussion topics can look like: which of our items are merging, and what items are going into storage or for donation? If areas of the house need remodeling, which spaces should we prioritize? What makes us feel at home and how can we make sure we both feel at home in this joint space?”
Chelsea Simpson, a life coach, also stresses the importance of addressing concerns promptly and calmly. “It’s not about winning or losing an argument but understanding each other’s perspective and working as a team,” Simpson encourages. Respecting each other’s boundaries—like the need for personal space—will ensure both partners feel comfortable and heard. “Taking time apart allows you to return to shared moments feeling refreshed and more present,” Simpson concludes. “Respecting each other’s boundaries will create a balanced, harmonious living situation where both partners can thrive.”
Regular check-ins can help the communication process feel like part of your new routine together. Max and Tatiana, who create tools for couples to connect at The Couple Summit, highlight relationship TLC as an important aspect of moving in with your partner. “Weekly or monthly relationship-focused conversations allow you to stay connected and discuss your relationship, home, and shared life. It’s an excellent opportunity to share what matters most—highlights, concerns, personal news, decor ideas, and more,” the couple shares. “Relationship check-ins help deepen your connection and nurture the home and life you’re building together.”
Build traditions and memories together
When you move in with your partner, it isn’t just about the items you place in your home and how you decorate—it’s also about creating a life together within those walls.
Grady Fort, Clinical Director and therapist at Bay Area Couples Collective, emphasizes how taking time to create traditions together in your new space can help it feel like home for both of you. “Making your own traditions in your new space can help you connect on a deeper level,” he describes. “Whether it’s baking cookies together, watching a favorite movie, or decorating your home during the holidays, finding something unique to share creates shared memories and strengthens your relationship.”
Sara Elchner, relationship coach, adds that things don’t make a home; it’s the meaning behind them and the memories that do. “It’s essential to approach decorating not just as filling a space with furniture, but as crafting a shared sanctuary that reflects both of your personalities,” Elchner shares. “Remember, the items you choose to surround yourselves with are not just things, but anchors of memories and tokens of love. Embrace this process as an opportunity to grow closer, learning about each other and yourselves along the way.”
Moving in together and creating a home that reflects you both
Moving in with your partner is a journey of compromise, collaboration, and creativity. By learning to work together, you’ll find that blending styles involves more than just combining aesthetics.
Relationship coach Julie Tenner sums it up best. “In every couple, there’s a balance of opposites: One’s a decor enthusiast, the other’s laid-back; one’s into minimalist vibes, the other loves sentimental shelves. Embrace the magic in these differences—let go where it’s not essential to you, and trust your partner’s lead. Together, you’ll create a home that’s a perfect reflection of both of you.” By combining what matters most to each of you and creating shared spaces that reflect your story, you’ll build not just a home, but a strong foundation for your relationship. Follow these decorating tips and ideas for moving in with your partner, and you’ll be sure to find your flow together in no time.
